I was about eleven years old when my grandma told me something important.


 One day, after school, I walked to my grandparents’ house. We lived on a farm, and the school was about a mile away through town to their place.


I was usually a happy kid, but that day, I felt kind of down. When I walked into Grandma's house, she noticed right away and decided to help. She took me to the kitchen, made me some hot chocolate, and gave me cookies, then waited for me to talk.


Halfway through my hot chocolate, I told her, “I thought this girl at school liked me, but today she said something mean. I don’t think anyone at school likes me.”


Grandma listened quietly while she drank her coffee. When she put her cup down, I knew she was going to share her wisdom.


“Totty,” she called me Totty instead of Kathy. “Totty, a few people will really like me and be my friend. A couple of people might not like me. But most people won’t care much about me. They might say hello or notice what I’m wearing, but once I’m out of sight, they’ll forget about me.”


Even though I was just 11, I understood what she meant. Some people will really like you, some won’t, but most people just don’t care that much. That’s just how it is. So thinking that everyone doesn’t like you is not true.


If someone walks by without saying hi, it doesn’t mean they don’t like you. Maybe they’re just thinking about something else. Sometimes, people might be rude. If you haven’t done anything wrong, it’s probably because they’re having a bad day, and it has nothing to do with you.


I’ve tried to remember this when something bad happens. If I didn’t do anything to upset someone, I just remind myself that it’s about something they’re going through, not me.

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